On this monumental day of hope and unity, all I can think is, "Man, my friends are idiots!"
Now, now, hear me out. Maybe it's me. First and foremost, the purpose of writing is to communicate an idea. It should be done clearly and concisely, for if the idea is not conveyed, the writer has failed.
Or her friends have sh*tty reading comprehension!
People, the point of "Name My Growth" was to DIAGNOSE my growth! And no, it's not lupus. It's never lupus. Now, I take some responsibility for the confusion because I did entitle the blog, "Name My Growth," but that sounded far zippier to me than, "Diagnose My Growth."
However, I did say in the very first paragraph that this was not a naming rights battle and the example I gave was from my friend Anne who had dibs on my growth being my heretofore dormant absorbed twin. "Absorbed twin complete with teeth and hair" is not a name and should not have led you to offer up "Tina Fey," "Alec Baldwin," or "Ralph." None of you actually suggested "Ralph," but that's what I would name my growth if I was actually naming it.
In addition to naming and not diagnosing, two of you yahoos started talking to each other and one posted a link to a completely unrelated site! Just what in the hell is going on out there??
So let's try again, shall we? That's if any of you are still speaking to me. Put on your little House hats and let's see what you can come up with. Please review the earlier blog for my extensive list of symptoms and give it your best shot!
And no, I do not have a stick up my...ask me no more questions, I'll tell you no more lies, the boys and girls are kissing in the D-A-R-K, D-A-R-K, D-A-R-K dark dark dark!
Thank you and good luck. Oh, and I really do enjoy and appreciate your comments, so keep 'em coming! ;)